Fifth Period Lunch

Trading carrots for chocolate pudding since 2012

The Mind Of The Yeti – 10.17.12

(By YetiVedder)

I want you to shout this like it is the beginning of a new rap song.  This is Yeti Vedder coming at you live and in full effect!  Sometimes my thoughts are just bizarre, while other times you might be thinking the same damn thing!   Turn me up in my headphones and drop that beat, because Yeti Vedder is about to spit some hot fire!

Just posing for pics again. The life of a celebrity.

*  Did you feel the earthquake in New England yesterday?  That was when Yeti Vedder was making love to all of you!

*  Halloween is the time of year where it is okay to walk around with blood splattered all over your shirt. So it’s an aspiring murderer’s favorite time of year.


*  Felix Baumgartner is the Daredevil that made the 23 mile leap from space. It is also a name no one will know in 2 months.  From this photo is he in a Boy Band or a Daredevil?


*  I am really liking the group that the Red Sox are bringing in to interview for the manager position. Every name they have mentioned I have been happy with. Whether it be Brad Ausmus, Tim Wallach, or DeMarlo Hale (who I hope gets it), all of them would be a solid and cheap manager. Tony Pena is in the lead mainly because of his sweet moustache!


*  I feel like I am saying this every week now, but if you had told me the Pats would start 3-3 I would have called you nuttier than a fruitcake. This team needs an identity on offense. Brady can’t be throwing the ball 60 times and they need to stop the RBBC and just give Ridley the rock. Woodhead is your 3rd down back, while Brandon Bolden is and should remain a nice story but a player coming off the bench. It is time for this team to step it up and I can’t think of a better week to do it then against the Jets!


*  With the way the Pats’ secondary has be playing Mark Sanchez should throw for about 500 yards.

*  I think the fans at the game should chant Tebow every time the Jets have the ball.


*  So I have it Romney – 1  &  Obama – 1 in the debates.  I think that for the last debate they shouldn’t argue, but rather have a dance off.   I bet more Americans would vote!  The fact that is a true statement is a sad reality for this country.  Who are you voting for?  Take a second and let FPL know by clicking here.

*  The Yankees will lose to the Tigers. I compare the Yankees to the human body. Derek Jeter is the heart of the Yankees. You remove the heart and the body can’t survive. I have a Tigers/Giants World Series.


*  Old School Jam Of The Week: This Is How We Do It by Montell Jordan. I thank the gods of smooth R&B every day for this song because I would have never known how to do it. It also is a great song to sing any time something awesome happens with your friends.


*  Josh Beckett Douche Of The Week: It may just be the Patriots’ fan in me, but who the hell is Richard Sherman to call out Tom Brady? Enjoy your 5 minutes of fame Mr. Sherman.


*  Soooo Farmhand (didn’t know that job title still existed) Carlos Romero was arrested for a sexual act with a miniature donkey named Doodle in the state of Florida.  His quote to police was, “I’ve never been a people person.”   From this video we also know that Carlos is brutally honest!   I want Chris Hanson to start catching these guys in the act!!

*  Shakira is pregnant. I hope her hips are childbearing and not liars.


*  I know for a fact that Eliza’s hips do not lie. They passed the Yeti Vedder lie detector.


*  Tweet Of The Week: Mr. Delonte West: @CharleeRedz13 Forreal though…don’t know bout ya Momas…but mine…she rather had the money…forget a gift…slid a few stacks in her acct. dis morn..


*  I love local news reports!   Where do you find a story about a kid who all of a sudden sounds like a dog toy?  Seriously, were dogs just chasing this kid as he walked down the street?  If this is your kid why do you want this on the news?  We let our kid swallow a whistle and now he can make a dog whistle noise.  Call Fox News!

*  You go to see Argo. I’ll wait to go to my couch and watch it on HBO.


*  Remember when Blockbuster Video was a booming business? I actually worked at one for a while and it was always packed. I’m going to open a mom and pop video rental place and just reap the benefits. Probably the benefits of owning a lot of movies, but that is pretty cool too!

*  This is my favorite time of year for beers. The weather gets a little colder and the beers get a little darker. I love watching football with an ice cold pint of Guinness. I highly recommend Berkshire Brewing Company’s Shabadoo Black and Tan or Revival Brewing’s Double Black IPA. Both delicious!


*  Basketball season is just around the corner! I love NBA and NCAA basketball! I especially love when Metta World Crazypants goes into the crowd. Not to beat up fans, but to kiss them on the hand. If I was an NBA player I would do this every game! Possibly add the singing of I’ll Make Love To You by Boyz II Men.


*  This is the year for my URI Rams, right???  Right!?!

*  Where have you gone Mallory Keaton, our nation turns its lonely eyes to you.

Any questions or comments you can find Yeti on Twitter @YetiVedder.  He’d love to hear from you!

About yetivedder

Straight outta Cumberland, R.I. is a crazy mother f'er named Yeti. I will steal your food, drink, and girl all while you are not looking. He might actually do it while you are looking but be very polite while taking all three. He will also do it in that order mainly because he is always hungry, thirsty, and horny! The Yeti will throw the greatest party that you won't remember, because he needs to remain a figment of your imagination. He wants the ladies to think that they may or may not have made love to a giant man last night while feeding him a steak and cheese sandwich! The Yeti is all about getting people to make bad decisions, but yet these bad decisions just feel so right. The Yeti is a diehard sports fan and is never afraid to show his team colors. He also isn't afraid to talk about himself in the third person like the greatest of all time Ricky Henderson! Yeti Likes: Easy women, cheap beer, expensive beer being given out for free, Red Sox baseball KFC and all, Lakers basketball, Metta World Peace, Bruins, Mashmond, Patriots, and bringing Randy Moss back! Easy women, URI basketball, old school WWF wrestling... Yeah I said F!, J's Deli samiches. Sponsor the Yeti page with some free sandwiches!!! More beer, and easy women! Tupac, Biggie, Snoop, Dre, Jay-Z Yeti dislikes: Wine drinkers that think they are better then me, Yeti hunters on TV that have no idea where Yeti's hang out! Hard women... Take that however you'd like... New school WWE, Any rapper with Lil or a direction in their name. Models who refuse to date me, when all I want to do is feed them. Relish of any kind... It is a Yeti kyrptonite.

One comment on “The Mind Of The Yeti – 10.17.12

  1. Virginia Wino
    October 17, 2012

    Nice…I had Tiggers/Gints series as well…Gints in 6

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