Trading carrots for chocolate pudding since 2012
For anyone who’s been reading me crab and complain about that shit I don’t like, I told you I would one day blast my San Diego Chargers.
Today is that day.
Wow, fellas. What a colossal choke job you guys pulled on Monday night.
I seriously went from bouncing and skipping throughout the house and wanting to help one of those sad pets that Sarah McLachlan tries to push on us to fitting myself in all black, moping around the crib and wanting to kick puppies.
Let me list some of the B.S. these clowns pulled off:
* After jumping to a 24-0 lead at halftime, the Bolts lost 35-24 to the Denver Broncos and fell victim to the fourth-biggest regular-season comeback in NFL history. According to ESPN analysts, it was the largest ever on a Monday night.
* Chargers quarterback Philip Rivers had a career-high six turnovers (career-high four interceptions, two fumbles).
* The Chargers failed to take a solid lead in the AFC West. A win would have put them at 4-2 overall and 1-0 vs. the division-rival Broncos. Denver would have been 2-4. Oakland is 1-4 and Kansas City is 1-5.
* Rivers-led teams were 4-1 against Peyton Manning-led teams coming into this matchup. Uh … four out of six ain’t bad?
* On a personal level, Rivers cost me fantasy wins in multiple leagues, but I won’t go into that.
Damn. First the Atlanta Braves’ wild-card debacle, now this shit. I’m sure the heartache will continue. Basketball season is around the corner, which likely means a ton of misery in the form of the Sacramento Kings. Although I’m braced for that, nothing could have prepared me for this.
Simply put, it’s time for change in the Whale’s Vagina. (Sorry to use the word “change” during a presidential election season. Your bad if you don’t get the WV reference.) I’ve defended Rivers for a long time. I know the offensive line has been, well, offensive, but I don’t think I can defend Rivers anymore. After all, San Diego kept him and let go of a quarterback who took a perennial loser to its first Super Bowl title. Ownership/management won’t spend money and continues to rely on a coach who had been a bust everywhere he went before taking the reins in S.D. Makes me wonder if Norv Turner has pictures of Spanos family members with goats and gimps.
I posted this on Facebook just a few days ago: “Wow. I can’t believe some people. If you’re only a fan when your team wins, please turn in your fan card now.” I was taking a shot at a so-called Oakland A’s fan who, after the team’s Game 5 ALDS loss, sent me a ton of messages calling them words I wouldn’t even print about the squads I despise! Even though I stand behind my post 100% percent, It’s really hard for me to love this team. In what seemed like almost an instant, elation turned into frustration.
No, I don’t have plans to jump ship, but it’s frustrating as hell because — unlike my Kings, who have some talented players but I don’t expect to do a whole lot this season simply because the Western Conference is so deep — in the Chargers, I see a team that, on any day, can compete with anyone despite a plethora of deficiencies, most notably on the O-line.
One thing is certain. I can guarantee/swear to God/put it on my mama/write it in blood that the Chargers will not lose in Week 7. Why? Because they are on a bye.
That gives me a week to get my head right. Oh, and find some new shit I don’t like.