Fifth Period Lunch

Trading carrots for chocolate pudding since 2012

The Mind Of The Yeti – 9.5.12

Yeti Vedder gives you a thumbs up for reading this.

(By YetiVedder)

*  I’m going to make top hats sexy again. I’m talking Abe Lincoln sexy.

*  Is there anything more depressing then having your team look completely lifeless, yet your owner wants to look tough and not fire the worthless manager. Right when this ownership team showed a little back bone with that trade, they have lost it by keeping Bobby V on board.

*  Opening night of NFL football is this evening and I am officially the happiest boy in the world! I like Eli and the Giants winning by a field goal.

*  Did anyone play the part of crazy old man better then Clint Eastwood last week? What’s that? He wasn’t acting? He was REALLY talking to an empty seat and speaking his mind? Oh… Oh that is just sad.

*  So The Price Is Right just had its 40th anniversary episode and didn’t invite Bob Barker or his skinny microphone! That is insane to me! That is like having Christmas and not inviting Santa Claus!

*  I always wanted to get on The Price Is Right just to yell at the audience to shut up so I could concentrate!

*  $1.00!

*  As unhappy as I am about my Red Sox just being awful, there is some satisfaction that the Yankees are choking down the stretch.

*  I must say that I hate the Nationals shutting down Strasburg. They are acting like getting to the playoffs and winning is easy. This Nats team has a very good shot at winning with Stasburg. They have no shot without him!

*  So Alabama looked pretty good on Saturday. Michigan on the other hand, not so much!

*  Jackie O has always been known as the hottest first lady. Well Michelle Obama is a close second! Her speech last night was pretty damn awesome! I don’t care what your political beliefs are, if you listened to her it was a great speech!

*  And Barbara Bush is the 44th!

*  Eliza will always be my first lady! Imagine Yeti Vedder with Eliza on his arm running for president in 2024? Can’t lose!

*  A music debate that I had this weekend is who is the best new songwriter of the last 5 years. I said Ray LaMontagne.

*  There are so many great shows on hiatus right now it is crazy! Lucky for me Boardwalk Empire is coming back and all will be well with Sunday nights again.

*  So the Patriots are bringing Kellen Winslow in for a tryout. It is official that by 2014 this team will be made up of all Tight Ends! This is still one of my favorite rants ever!

*  Hey Brian Waters, time to wake up from your nap of 3 months and come play football again! The Patriots can use you!!!

*  Where have you gone Rudy Huxtable, our nation turns its lonely eyes to you.

Any questions or comments you can find Yeti on Twitter @YetiVedder.  He’d love to hear from you!

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About yetivedder

Straight outta Cumberland, R.I. is a crazy mother f'er named Yeti. I will steal your food, drink, and girl all while you are not looking. He might actually do it while you are looking but be very polite while taking all three. He will also do it in that order mainly because he is always hungry, thirsty, and horny! The Yeti will throw the greatest party that you won't remember, because he needs to remain a figment of your imagination. He wants the ladies to think that they may or may not have made love to a giant man last night while feeding him a steak and cheese sandwich! The Yeti is all about getting people to make bad decisions, but yet these bad decisions just feel so right. The Yeti is a diehard sports fan and is never afraid to show his team colors. He also isn't afraid to talk about himself in the third person like the greatest of all time Ricky Henderson! Yeti Likes: Easy women, cheap beer, expensive beer being given out for free, Red Sox baseball KFC and all, Lakers basketball, Metta World Peace, Bruins, Mashmond, Patriots, and bringing Randy Moss back! Easy women, URI basketball, old school WWF wrestling... Yeah I said F!, J's Deli samiches. Sponsor the Yeti page with some free sandwiches!!! More beer, and easy women! Tupac, Biggie, Snoop, Dre, Jay-Z Yeti dislikes: Wine drinkers that think they are better then me, Yeti hunters on TV that have no idea where Yeti's hang out! Hard women... Take that however you'd like... New school WWE, Any rapper with Lil or a direction in their name. Models who refuse to date me, when all I want to do is feed them. Relish of any kind... It is a Yeti kyrptonite.

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